This verse is one of my very favorite bible verses about peace. It really strikes a personal chord with me. In the 14 years that I have been living with Leukemia, I can only remember 3 moments that I wasn't at peace about it:
- the moment I was diagnosed...being at my appointment alone (since Kevin had taken Hannah (3) and Mason (1) to the pediatrician), having to be immediately admitted to the hospital and tell Kevin over the phone why he couldn't pick me up at the doctor's office.
- the moment after being diagnosed with pulmonary hypertension 11 years later when I got home from the ER and googled the disease that I knew nothing about
- the moment a year after that when I was told my only 2 options were a clinical trial or a bone marrow transplant...both of which would be incredibly costly and straining on work and family
But within minutes/hours of each of those moments I was filled with a peace that definitely surpassed all understanding...even before knowing how lucky I would end up being. I just knew that one way or another everything would be OK...even if it wasn't what I had in mind. And by the grace of God:
- I have lived with Leukemia for 14 blessing-filled years on various medications with a few uncomfortable side effects and unpleasant procedures...all of which could have been so much worse.
- That scary pulmonary hypertension diagnosis was just a temporary side effect of a medication and was reversed, with treatment, in a year's time.
- Those 2 scary options were based on errors in blood work, so it never came to that. I was then lucky enough to have a year of medication free remission! Then last year, around this time, the Leukemia showed up again in my blood work. And after another year on a new medication, I have reached a medication induced remission! I will continue to be on this medication, but remission (even if temporary, and even if requiring medication) is always an amazing thing!
I don't often speak about my opinions. I tend to avoid conflict at all costs, and I fight my battles with prayer. I believe in faith, hope, and love. I believe in spreading joy and kindness. I believe in looking for the good, and being the good if you can't find it. I believe there's always light in the darkness, and I believe in finding Jesus in everyone. I believe that these are difficult times and that these are the exact times we need to focus on God and prayer...and in doing so, we can find a peace that surpasses all understanding. I believe that if we can find peace in personal times of trouble that we can find peace in global times of trouble, too. I believe in the prayer of St. Francis:
